But I can neglect Period Fairy no longer. So, here's a not-so-bitter *ahem* rant about the difference between early pregnancy and PMS symptoms.
There are none.
Let me set the scene in case you've never been through the dreadful two-week wait:
You've just charted your cycles for the past months/years, so you know when your fertile week is. You know which day you ovulate. You've been taking your vitamins, and doing all the horizontal dancing. You probably even smirked at yourself while you kept your pelvis raised and your legs in the air after, didn't you?
Then it starts. The waiting and wondering. For two weeks you over-analyze every tiny thing your body feels and does. "Oh, my boobs hurt! Yes, I peed so many times today! There's a twinge in my lower abdomen! It took me a bit longer today to do the duty! I cried at that commercial about fabric softener because of my insane hormones! Ooh, all the cravings I have--someone get me something sweet, please! I must be pregnant. All the signs. I just know it. I feel different this time."
For two weeks you feel the the smartest detective on the planet.
And the last few days before the potential period are a frenzy. You might take an early detection at home pregnancy test. It's a negative, but you don't let it dampen your hopes. Maybe just a few more days. And then the spotting starts. And you think, crap, this could be my period...OR IT COULD BE PREGNANCY! My body is just being tricky. Riiiight...I gotcha.
And then your hopes are right back up because you just know you feel all the signs this time.
Except you're completely insane, and you know it, because you know perfectly well that all those signs of pregnancy are also signs that you're getting your monthly reminder that there's nothing in your uterus except sadness. And lots of gore.
And all you can do is wait it out because (especially if you've never been pregnant before) you're not going to know until you know, and it won't be in those two weeks, darling.
But what level of cruelty is it that the symptoms are the same for both? Honestly. Seriously, what even?
So there you have it. Women who have been pregnant before may tell you they felt some signs that were different. Their cramping felt different. They got dizzy. There was morning sickness. They felt a special feeling. But guess what? I've felt all those things, too, and it turns out I was just so hopeful I was delusional or something. Also, your body is not her body, so what might have been true for her may not be for you.
Not at all helpful, right? Exactly! Sorry. No, really, I am. I keep trying to find something helpful that will give me the final clue that will tell me whether or not I am pregnant during those two weeks, but there is nothing.
Thoughts? Did you find the special sauce that told you early? Share your experience either way in the comments below or find me on Twitter @Je55ieMullin5 or on Facebook.
Thanks for reading! May the Period Fairy be gentle with you.
P.S. I promise I'm not as bitter as I sound.
P.P.S. That may not be true.